Live to Work, Or Work to Live?

My struggle to achieve work-life balance.

Three years after my wife and I established our consulting firm, we noticed a change in behavior in our two daughters. They were acting up and talking back to us—moreso than the typical kid—and it took us a while to pinpoint why.

At the time, my wife and I were both working 10- to 14-hour days, sometimes seven days a week. We traveled often. We ate meals in our offices while our children ate at the kitchen table. We were so focused on building our firm that we hadn’t realized our work was the root cause for the kids’ behavior. They needed attention, we needed to be parents and had to take a cold, hard look at our schedules and priorities.

We cancelled a business meeting that day and made reservations at a quiet restaurant to discuss what we should do. Nearly four hours later we concluded that one of us had to focus on the children, at least five hours out of the day. We agreed to share that responsibility, and mandated that there would be no more eating in the office, no more “I’m too busy” excuses.

The struggle with work-life balance plagues every business owner and many of us can agree that we could afford to spend a little more time with family, whether it’s with our friends, spouse, children or even parents as they age. Work-life balance is a challenge to achieve, and as I learned, it’s an evolving process in which you’ll slip up time to time, and that these habits are difficult to form. A few lessons I learned along the way:

1. You’re not the only one with family. My wife and I discovered that once we shared with our clients that our schedules were shifting, they responded very well and were often open to requests for alternative dates, times and venues for meetings. They, too, had family to tend to.

2. Think you don’t have time? MAKE time for your family every day. Schedule it, if you have to and devote yourself to them 100 percent during that time. Turn off the cell phone, shut down the computer.

3. Cherish dinnertime. Designate, like I did, the office as off-limits during dinner. Make this time of day when everyone talks with each other about their day, the good things, the bad things. Your family will appreciate it, and you’ll appreciate your family and the time you spend with them more.

Changing my habits—the long days, the late business meetings, the working dinners—was hard. My wife and I made the decision to work as a team to keep each other on track with work and family life, and it was hard work—but work I’m grateful to have done.

Have you struggled with work-life balance? How were you able to achieve it? Leave a comment–I’d love to hear your story.